Pizza Physics

I had reservations about writing a pizza blog. I mean, you make a base, you dress it, then you put it in the oven and ta-daaaar. But a degree of Wissenschaft comes into play when things get multi-storey. I make these magnificent architectural creations in three phases: 

1. Make the base and add the tomato sauce with some of the juiciest/ moist ingredients (like pineapple, tomatoes, sweetcorn, prawns, etc). This will warm up the pizza and allow excess water to escape by evaporation so it doesn't lead to an icky puddle leaking out like an old lady's piss pants at the end. If you just plopped everything on all at once, the lower and most central components might not heat up in time whilst the external part of the pizza will be burned. 10-15 minutes should do it, depending on your heat setting and the location of your pizza in the oven.

2. Meanwhile roast the toughest and most fibrous vegetables (like broccoli, peppers, onion, mushrooms etc) and let them break down and get some time to cook in the oven before you add them to your heated base. 20-30 minutes should do it. Additionally, adding roasted vegetables allows thorough cooking, and improves their flavour. 

3. Finally, after heating together the ingredients from step 1 and 2 above (not so they burn, but enough to get them steaming and wilting down) add the final layer of ingredients that usually don't take so long to cook (e.g. pepperoni, salami, feta, mozzarella, cheddar, anchovies, red kidney beans, etc). That way everything should come to fruition at just the right time. And the right place. 

I'm not here to tell you what to put on your pizza, or for how long. It's a goddam democracy and you can do what you like. But I can tell you a judicious amount of pre-cooking is a rewarding endeavour when you are contemplating an ascent to your own personal Eiger of pizza achievement. Good luck and may the Pizza Gods (who were Roman obviously) go with you. 

German Beer Face-Off: Bitburger vs Vulkan vs Kölsch

Germany’s beer culture is legendary, and for good reason. Among its vast brewing landscape, Bitburger, Vulkan, and Kölsch stand out—each offering a distinct character, production story, and drinking experience. Whether you’re a curious beer lover or a seasoned enthusiast, here’s how these three compare.

Bitburger: The Classic German Pilsner

Style: Pilsner
Origin: Bitburg, Rhineland-Palatinate
ABV: ~4.8%
Production: Bitburger has been brewed since 1817, and it proudly adheres to the Reinheitsgebot (German Beer Purity Law). Its brewing process focuses on top-quality ingredients—local water from the Eifel mountains, Hallertau hops, and malted barley. Bitburger even developed its own yeast strain, ensuring a consistent taste.
Character: Aroma: Crisp, floral hop notes with subtle malt sweetness. Taste: Dry, with a balanced bitterness and light body. Finish: Clean and refreshing—textbook pilsner precision.
Vibe: Bitburger is a staple in Germany’s pilsner culture. It’s not flashy, but its reliability makes it perfect for any occasion, from summer BBQs to after-work drinks. Their famous slogan, "Bitte ein Bit" ("A Bit, please"), speaks to how ingrained this beer is in German society.

Vulkan: The Eifel Craft Pioneer

Style: Wide range (from Pils to Red Ale, IPA, and even experimental brews)

Origin: Mendig, Eifel region

ABV: Varies, typically between 4.5% - 7%

Production: Vulkan Brauerei stands out for its location—perched above ancient lava caves. These natural cellars provide perfect conditions for lagering beer. Vulkan embraces both tradition and innovation, combining classic German brewing methods with craft creativity. They use high-quality local water and a wide selection of hops and malts, often playing with different styles and limited editions.

Character (Flagship Vulkan Pils): Aroma: Grassy hops with a hint of citrus. Taste: Crisp malt backbone with herbal bitterness. Mouthfeel: Fuller than a typical industrial pils, thanks to craft-style brewing.

Vibe: Vulkan blends German brewing heritage with a modern craft twist. It’s the beer for adventurous drinkers who want a taste of Eifel’s volcanic terroir, plus some creative flair in the mix. Their Vulkan Pale Ale or Porter is a bold choice if you want to venture beyond the pilsner comfort zone.

Kölsch: Cologne’s Golden Gem

Style: Kölsch
Origin: Cologne (Köln), North Rhine-Westphalia
ABV: ~4.8%
Production: Kölsch is brewed exclusively in Cologne, protected by a geographical indication similar to Champagne but ironically is famously a low-gas beer. It’s a hybrid brew—top-fermented like an ale but cold-conditioned like a lager. This unique process results in its distinctive character: clean and crisp, yet subtly fruity.
Character: Aroma: Soft fruit notes (apple, pear) with delicate maltiness. Taste: Light-bodied, gently hoppy with a touch of sweetness. Finish: Smooth and slightly dry.
Vibe: Kölsch isn’t just a beer; it’s a culture. In Cologne’s famous Kölsch bars, it’s served in slender Stange glasses, constantly refreshed until you say stop. It’s the ultimate social beer—easy-drinking and designed for long conversations.

Final Verdict

Bitburger - Style: Pilsner, Key Strength: Classic, dependable quality, Best For: German beer purists
Vulkan - Style: Craft Lager & More, Key Strength: Innovative with Eifel character, Best For: Craft lovers & adventurers
Kölsch - Style: Hybrid Ale-Lager, Key Strength: Light, social, ultra-drinkable, Best For: Long nights out with friends

In Short: Grab a Bitburger for that no-nonsense pilsner fix. Explore Vulkan if you’re feeling curious and crave something craft-inspired. Sip on Kölsch if you want a beer that’s all about social vibes and local culture.

Mosel Boat Tour: Cochem to Beilstein

A boat tour on the Mosel River in Cochem is a magical experience, offering a perfect way to soak in the beauty of one of Germany’s most picturesque regions. Cochem, a charming town nestled along the Mosel, is surrounded by lush vineyards, rolling hills, and medieval castles, creating a stunning backdrop as you glide down the river.

As the boat sets off, you’re immediately greeted with breathtaking views of Reichsburg Cochem, a fairy-tale-like castle perched high on a hill. Originally built around the year 1000, it was destroyed by French troops in 1689 and remained in ruins for centuries before being lovingly restored in the 19th century. Now, with its neo-Gothic architecture, richly furnished rooms, and sweeping views of the Mosel Valley, it stands as a striking landmark. Some boat tours even offer the chance to visit the castle, stepping back in time to experience its grandeur firsthand.

Drifting along the calm waters, the landscape unfolds with steep, terraced vineyards that produce some of the finest Riesling wines in the world. The Mosel Valley’s beauty changes with the seasons—lush green vines in summer, golden hues in autumn, and a crisp, misty charm in the cooler months. Many tours include stops at local wineries where visitors can sample the region’s celebrated wines. Meanwhile, onboard bars offer cool beers, refreshing ices, and even pizza, making the journey as relaxing as it is scenic.

A little way south of Cochem, the boat reaches Beilstein, often called the "Sleeping Beauty of the Mosel." This quaint village, with its cobbled streets and medieval charm, feels like a step back in time. Overlooking the town is Burg Metternich, a ruined castle that adds to the romantic atmosphere. Though partially in ruins, it offers spectacular views of the river valley and surrounding vineyards.

Whether you’re cruising in the warm afternoon glow or beneath the golden hues of a sunset, a boat tour on the Mosel is an unforgettable way to experience the region. The gentle rhythm of the water, the ever-changing landscape, and the historic charm of Cochem and Beilstein come together to create a truly memorable journey.

The Wonder (2022)

 The Wonder (2022), directed by Sebastián Lelio and based on Emma Donoghue’s novel, is a haunting, slow-burn psychological drama that grips you with its unsettling atmosphere and richly layered narrative. Set in 1862 Ireland, the film revolves around a young girl, Anna (Kila Lord Cassidy), who, it’s claimed, has not eaten for months yet remains alive and well, leading to widespread fascination and suspicion. A nurse, Lib (Florence Pugh), is sent to observe her, tasked with determining whether this is a miracle, a hoax, or something more sinister.

The beauty of The Wonder lies in its ability to create a sense of claustrophobia and tension from the simplest moments. The rural Irish setting, with its mist-covered fields and stark interiors, adds a weight to the already heavy atmosphere. Lelio’s direction is meticulous, focusing on the subtle interactions between the characters, while also drawing attention to the larger societal and religious forces that are at play in this small community. The cinematography is breathtaking, but it’s the sound design—the quiet creaks of a wooden house or the soft murmur of voices—that truly elevates the film’s sense of dread.

Florence Pugh delivers yet another stellar performance, embodying Lib with a quiet intensity. She brings depth to her character, whose own troubled past slowly unravels over the course of the film. Pugh’s subtle shifts in expression and her interactions with the villagers, particularly Anna’s mother (Elaine Cassidy), are riveting. It’s a performance that demands patience from the audience but rewards it with a deeply human portrayal of a woman searching for truth amid an ocean of superstition and fear.

The story’s central mystery—the “miracle” of Anna’s survival—raises poignant questions about faith, power, and the human need to control the uncontrollable. The Wonder doesn’t offer clear answers. Instead, it invites the viewer to reflect on the nature of belief and the lengths people will go to uphold it, even when faced with evidence to the contrary. The film’s pace is deliberate, requiring patience, but it’s also beautifully crafted, with each scene building toward a revelatory conclusion that is both satisfying and disquieting.

However, the film’s slower pace may be a point of contention for some. While the slow-burn tension works for most of the film, certain moments feel drawn out, and there’s a sense that some viewers may find themselves impatient for the story to move forward. The tension, though palpable, can sometimes feel as though it’s spinning its wheels before reaching its emotional payoff.

In the end, The Wonder is a film that demands reflection and a willingness to sit with its discomforts. It’s not a traditional mystery or thriller, but rather an exploration of human nature and the often dangerous grip that belief can have on people. With a standout performance from Pugh, evocative cinematography, and a story that lingers long after the credits roll, The Wonder is a meditative, unsettling experience that doesn’t give easy answers—but perhaps that’s exactly the point.

Trasshöhlen, Burgbrohl

Tucked away in the scenic Brohl Valley of the Eifel region, the Trasshöhlen caves near Burgbrohl offer a fascinating glimpse into the area’s volcanic past. These caves are not just striking natural formations; they are remnants of a powerful eruption that shaped the landscape thousands of years ago.

Around 13,000 years ago, the Laacher See volcano, just a few kilometers from Burgbrohl, erupted with incredible force, blanketing the region in volcanic ash and debris. Over time, these layers of ash hardened into a unique rock called "trass," which has been used since Roman times for its exceptional properties in construction. The caves themselves are the result of centuries of mining, where generations of workers carved into the cliffs to extract this valuable material. Today, what remains is an intricate network of tunnels and caverns that wind through the trass cliffs, offering an atmospheric and otherworldly place to explore.

Walking through the Trasshöhlen is like stepping into a different world. The caves are cool and shadowy, their walls bearing the marks of ancient labour, while just outside, the landscape is lush and wild. One of the best ways to experience the area is by following the Höhlen- und Schluchtensteig, or the "Cave and Gorge Trail," which takes hikers through dense forest, past towering rock formations, and directly into the caves themselves. Along the way, the path leads to the dramatic Wolfsschlucht, or "Wolf’s Gorge," where a waterfall tumbles over mossy rocks, and the sound of rushing water fills the air.

The Trasshöhlen are open to visitors year-round, making them a perfect destination for a spontaneous day trip or a planned excursion. A well-marked trail, the "Trasshöhlenweg," provides an informative, self-guided walk with signs explaining the geological and historical significance of the caves and their surroundings. It’s a place where nature and history blend seamlessly, where you can feel both the power of ancient volcanic forces and the human stories that have shaped the land.

Getting there is easy; just a short drive off the A61 motorway, exiting at Niederzissen and following the B412 toward Brohl-Lützing. Parking is available near Café-Restaurant Jägerheim or in Bad Tönisstein, just a short walk from the caves.

Whether you’re a hiking enthusiast, a geology lover, or simply looking for a peaceful escape into nature, the Trasshöhlen caves in Burgbrohl offer an unforgettable experience. With their rich history, breathtaking surroundings, and a sense of timelessness in their cool, quiet depths, they are a hidden gem waiting to be discovered.